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| Motivation during Maintenance; My demise | |
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| Topic Started: Jun 10 2007, 08:00 PM (83 Views) | |
| Noeleen | Jun 10 2007, 08:00 PM Post #1 |
Newbie
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Hi All , as most of you will know , over the past 3 years I have lost 50 kgs ( 110 lbs ) ...for the past year or so I managed to maintain that, until now . My starting weight was 105kgs ( 231 lbs ) my lowest weight was 54kgs ( 118.8 lbs ) . I am now weighing in at 62 kgs (136.4 lbs ) . I am still in my healthy weight range , but feel absolutely disgusting , fat , bloated , uncomfortable , unhealthy , lethargic . Apart from recent emotional and work related stress , I feel my lack of motivation appears to be maintenance itself . I felt I had nothing to strive for . The hours needed to be put in to maintain or improve on where I was at fitness wise and weight wise seemed way too demanding . I simply did not have the time or engery to maintain that level . I wanted to have more of a life than just going to gym , working out , going to work , housework and tracking everything I ate . How does one find that happy balance??? I did not like the direction I was heading , obssessing about every part of my body not being good enough , contsantly trying to be better. Becoming a bore to my friends and relatives . But I found once I let go of my obsession , I let go of everything . Ok given I have been suffering some type of depression in recent months , which ofcourse has added to my lack of motivation , I now need to get back on track , but how do I do this with out falling back into the same trap? I seem to be an all or nothing person , and right now , I'm finding it difficult to give it my all. As far as I can work out , I need to concentrate on diet foremost , with diet change , hopefully I will begin to lose pounds , increase my energy levels to a point where I feel I can start exercising again . Anyone that has ever suffered with depression will know , you feel simply exhausted all the time , even getting out of bed is a hard task . For the past few months all I have managed to do is go to work , I sleep away most of the weekends simply too tired to deal with anything else. Today is my day of change , I must put an end to this destructive behaviour , learn to deal with my stress /depression in ways other than comfort eating . I want my mind and body back . I think , perhaps , when I return to exercising , I will start by working out 3-4 times per week . And see how I go with that . I do not wish to start the 7 day a week work outs , sometimes twice per day as I had been doing previously. I often wonder , why is it so difficult for me to maintain , I find it easy enough to lose weight when I put my mind to it , I find it very easy to gain weight lol , but why can't I ever find balance?? It's one thing having goals and striving , it's quite another reaching them , then what?? |
 Goal: to reach 55kgs by Christmas ! Change your Thoughts and you Change your World! | |
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| flowerfluffgirl | Jun 10 2007, 08:32 PM Post #2 |
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I know exactly what you mean Noels. I was this weight about 7 weeks ago and I got scared about what would happen when I had no more weight to lose and gained about 3kgs back. Maybe take a look at Purple and Stormgirl. They are pretty much on maintainence now, I'm sure they can offer loads of great advice. This whole weight thing shouldn't be a battle or feel like a chore. For me, being so close to goal again, it's not really about the weight anymore. It's not about the numbers. It's about being in control of my mental state and my physical body. It's about working with what I have and striving to make it the best I possibly can and also accepting I'm not gonna be perfect. Knowing that I'm taking care of myself and looking after myself keeps a smile on my face and my spirits high. This is about being in control of my life. |
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Age: 30 Height: 5'6" 
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| Noeleen | Jun 10 2007, 10:03 PM Post #3 |
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So very true Fluff , it's such a vicious cycle for me ..... Unhappy overdoing diet and exercise , unhappy gaining weight and letting go . Balance balance balance ! |
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Goal: to reach 55kgs by Christmas ! Change your Thoughts and you Change your World! | |
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| stormgirl | Jun 16 2007, 07:53 PM Post #4 |
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Noeleen, firstly I can SO associate with this post....you really are not alone with this one. I will probably bang on now so bear with me. It is 02:30am and I am jet lagged so might not make much sense...I am so sorry to hear you have been suffering from depression. That is a huge complicating factor I am sure...let alone having to deal with maintenance on its own. I have managed to gain 7 pounds in 12 days...quite unprecedented considering the amount of time I have maintained my weight at 149 pounds for. I accept that some of this gain was rehydration and the fact I have done NO exercise for 12 days..in many ways my body is completely out of synch and confused. I have been completely inactive..sitting on my behind for hours on end and getting no exercise. Gaining this extra weight was inevitable, I knew that I would succumb to the food in the US and did take the 'sod it, I am on my hols' approach eventually. AndBOY have I over eaten...to the point of gluttony! so I knew this would be an interesting experiment to see how much weight I would gain after the huge amount of exercise I have been doing these past months. I have reviewed the way I have been doing things and I cannot maintain the volume of exercise I was taking. Now this scares me to a certain degree as I irrationally think that I will gain weight automatically if I back away from what I was doing. I am mentally exhausted by the whole process...from that first day when I was 301 pounds and started losing weight. So I have decided that I am not going to do as much exercise now..perhaps 4 times a week (like you Noeleen)and gain some control back on this. But you are right when you say that it is easy to lose and VERY easy to gain but so hard to maintain! One good thing is that I realise how much I don't miss junk food! I am looking forward to some lower fat options again and that is a huge achievement for me as a few years back I would have kept eating like it when I got home. i too have been obsessing about every little bit of me...it got to such a point where people would pay me compliments and I would think 'yeah but my thighs are still bulky...you haven't seen me naked!' Silly, I know. I feel bloated and large now, despite the fact that I went to a mall in the Us and was fitting into small sizes. This should tell me that my own perception of my body is distorted and I am not viewing this in an entirely healthy way. Unfortunately we are going to struggle with this for life at some point of another...but I know now that I can drop these extra pounds and get back down to maintenance...I have the tools and know how to do so and so do you. We have been through enough to not let any large gain stay on for too long but that balance if def hard to reach. Keep experimenting with it and I am sure we will get there. I am rooting for you, you know you can always turn to me if you need a chat as we sound so similar. I am also an 'all or nothing' person and my personality is to one extreme or another...we have the dedication and drive to succeed but we also have the capabilities of scuppering things for ourselves by giving up. This needs to be controlled first, before even the diet or exercise...  |
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7:43 AM Nov 19